Il dio conserva la mafia di Medford!

Becasue they have a typing pool!

Although it has now become a coined phrase I don’t think I will ever have to use it in a literal sense ever again. That is unless I go back to work for a company that makes its profits from that one line on my paycheck via Uncle Sam.

Why is he called Uncle Sam? What is that old fat hairy Uncle good for? Because he knows how to spend my money better than I do, right! I mean he is at my doorstep for money every time I get paid. He visits once a year to make sure I didn’t make to much money in places other than my paycheck. He takes that money and uses it to de-motivate people and keep them suckling the nipple most notoriously known as well-fare. Ect., ect. ect (I think my point can be made without going any further.)

So today, in a drastic change from my past position, I did something that wasn’t demanded…and I didn’t even have to ask my local Union representative! Tyson Browning would be so proud! I took one of my first project schedules and in order to better understand it and explain issues to people I created a DSM. What’s a DSM you ask. Well its this neat little chart you can create in Excel! What’s it stand for? I don’t remember! What exactly does it do? I don’t really remember all the details. BUT ! People were impressed and it helped me identify potential areas of rework…I think! Or at least that’s what everyone believes since I explained it that way.

At least I was able to pass something along before I get killed by the local mafia guy in my neighborhood. Besides I think he might let it slide since it was his wife and not his comare! He has had time to talk to the Capo Di Tutti Capi and ask for permission to capp the baboo who disrespected him by slapping his wife on the ass in a restaurant in front of everyone. I should still probably keep my eye out for some cugine enforcer who is out to give me a turban and dispose of me in some double-decker coffin.

I better close my yap before I get squirted with metal.